im having mood swings 2day..
1st im happi..
nw im frustrated n pissed at the same tyme...

at skool during D&T,went 2 walk around at lower sec block..
Shazrul decided 2 go 2 the toilet..
waited 4 hym at the chin up place..
realised it was end of lower secondary reccess..
coincidentally saw Nadila looking at me from above..(nothing obscene seen)

she smiled..
i smiled back..DUH!!!
then she waved..
n with fcuking happiness in my heart,i waved back...
ahahahahahah...

went back 2 workshop..

end of school..
thought going 2 make my IC..
then mother said tyme was late..
WTF?!?!?!?
if lazy juz say lazy...

summore later go eat outside..
wth ryte??
then father ask me 2 buy this disgusting pair of slippers..
fcuking pissed...
juz bought it anyway...

den mother wnted 2 print pictures from phone...
n dunnoe hw 2 do..
in my mind i was lyk"if dunnoe hw 2 use phone,den dun use..so troublesome"
took 20 long mins 2 print 5 bloody pictures..
she took lyk forever 2 pick the pictures
n only chose 5..
CB!!!

im feeling frustrated ryte nw 2 coz im sumtymes typing wrong words n also tis stupid arrow is going everywhere which sumtymes forces me 2 write at the wrong place..
bloody hell!!!

the number 10..the one who makes the difference







2day after skool go z club..
hehehehehe...
wore my coveted Captain's armband..
JYEAH!!!
agin,i was great..

brought down by my 2nd team..
with the midfielders fucked up dunnoe where..
only me,zulhelmi,shaz doing the running..
gt so angry one tyme i shouted lyk hell..
tat tyme Mr Razif was tackling me...
looking 4 the centre mids bt none were there 2 provide support 4 me..

bt aside from tat,i scored from the sidelines..
5 metres outside the penalty box..
used my laces 2 shoot..
the ball went straight up..
den back down with the keeper beaten..
it was unexpected bt tat was expected of me..
im so unpredictable..

n i think i was 2 hard on the players..
i kept shouting n shouting..
bt mayb tat is my nature..
i laugh outside..
bt when im on the field,i'll be fcuking serious..

nex week on wednesday hav a game against Woodgrove sec..
mayb sec 3 NA students cant play coz they hav 2 attend sumting at an ITE..
so our team is gonna be quite weak..
of course with me as the Captain,i'll nt let tat dampen our spirits..
we can do it if we believe..

bye all!!!

when guys go 2 town

we go play soccer still ambik gamba here..heheh..

kecohrables again!!!





past 2 days..
went out with guy frens..
on Sunday,went 2 town with Syukri,Syah,Latiff n 2 other of Syah's frens namely An n Boi..
gerek ppl they are..
1st go jln2 look 4 hoodie 4 Syah..
den mkn..
tat tyme An heaven't arrived yet..
den mkn..
Boi nvr finish so i finished it 4 hym..ahaha

made decision 2 play CS..
called An..
he heard playing CS n he immediately came down..
hahaha...
Boi blanje me...

after tat go Marina Square look 4 hoodie again..
finally Syah found one at ZARA which he lyked..
bought it..
i think it costs $59.90.
just a guess..
i 4gt..

den nex day go play soccer at nite..
played at Circle Green..
1st match lost..
2nd match onwards we conquerd the matrep/minah rep infested court..
WE SHOWED THEM!!!

go 888..
on the way saw a vehicle
i think construction workers use it..
Latiff gt crazy idea of taking pictures on it..
so we did!!!
tats all 4 the past 2 days..

2day nothing much..

Happy birthday Kamarul!!!
u've gone through 15 hard years..
stay strong alrite..
if u still believe u n her r meant 2gether,dun give up...
keep believing n show her tat u deserve her..
she'll come 2 her senses someday..

give her tyme..
she'll realise tat she's missing out on many things..
dun give up on her aite Kamarul???

jyeah!!!i'll nt give up on her..
she's my Dream Girl...
always has benn n will be..

n once again,Happy Birthday 2 myself..
celebrate tis yr lyk preious years..
alone..
with the one i love out of sight..

i dunnoe y the heck i titled tis sweet stuff...

well,abt 2day...
didn't go 2 school..
fucking lazy..
woke up at 6:30..
went 2 wake up my mother..
she was already awake..
said i didn't wanna go 2 school 2day..
she asked y..
i simply said..lazy..heheh

followed mama 2 JB..
meet her fren 2 go do some medicating...
her feet hurt..
juz followed..
she's my mama afterall..
more important than "HER"
biggest priority..
although i may seem rude 2 her,im still her son..

back home around 2pm..
5pm went down 2 play soccer..
juz play n then rain..
WAH CB!!!
go 2 bus stop in front of school coz gt nothing 2 do..
coincidentally saw Nadila n gang..
dunnoe y she was taking the bus..
she lives juz in front of school!!!
bt nvm..at least i gt 2 see her wave n smile at me..

went home..
mama watching tv n ayah still asleep..
n wth..
went into the room..
abang nt 2 be seen,so i turned on laptop..
till nw..wait until he does he's usual routine..
he'll come back around 10,11 or 12..
bagi salam..then slams the gate..
come in front of his door..n
BAM!!!!he kicks the door open..
i'll still be there using the effing laptop..
if im gd,i'll go offline n juz leave..
if nt,i'll juz sit here n see wat he says..
he says "klua la..aku nk tukar baju"
i'll gt out..
sumtimes he juz leaves..
means he's afraid of me..NYAHAHA!!!

this post is fcuking stupid..
bye..

watch my bloody videos on youtube..
juz search mercurialsl1

Im Diagnosed With Love

I'm Starin At The Clock
It's A Quarter To Three
I'm Tossin In My Bed
Cause I Just Can't Sleep
Cause You're Not Here With Me
I'm Reachin Out For You
I Wish I Could Talk To You
Tryna Figure Out What's Goin On With Me
I'm Used To Havin All The Answers For Everything
Oh Girl
I Think She Is The One
Where Is That Comin From?

Feels So Crazy
Baby You Simply Amaze me
So Much More Than Lately
I Owe It All To You
All Those Games We
Use To Play Now
Seem So Lame To Me
What I'm Comin Down With
Feels New To Me
All I Know Is That You Are The Cure
Cause I Been Diagnosed With Love

Does Anybody Know The Answer To This Question
Cause I'm Confused Now
I'm Opened For Suggestions
My Heart Is Talkin Loud (So Loud)
What Is This About (About)
I'm Really Changin Now, Oh
Cleared All The Numbers Out My Phone
Done Left That Whole Life Alone
Those Are Two Of The Symptoms I See
And I Believe
Oh Girl, I Am Sure
That You Are My Miracle

Feels So Crazy
Baby You Simply Amaze Me
So Much More Than Lately
I Owe It All To You
All Those Games We
Use To Play Now
Seem So Lame To Me
What I'm Comin Down With
Feels New To Me
All I Know Is That You Are The Cure
Cause I Been Diagnosed With Love



normal day at skool..
juz tat it felt awkward nt goin 2 skool wit her..
n by normal i mean boring n full of nonsense..

1:30 break headed down 2 the canteen 2 grab a quick bite..
then talk..
went up staircase 2 go back class..
juz as i reached 1/2 floor(juz understand)
saw her class..

den she came out..WOOHOO!!!
i waved at her..
n guess wat???
she waved back wit the smile tat i really miss!!!!!
from tat moment,i was so refreshed lyk on any day she was with me..
didn't sleep 4 a second in class..
heheh
im gonna stay single till graduation day 2 wait 4 her...
if she still doesnt change her mind..
i will open my heart 2 others..

tats all..
gonna do english project with mamat later

this is taken after Racial Harmony Day during lepak hours
it involves me(Kamarul Hawtstuff),Al-Afiq and Megat..

3LEGENDS!!!

bye2...mayb i'll see u soon

broke up wit her yesterday..
she made the decision2 do so..

im still quite shaken..
i need some tyme 2 get over her..
dun noe hw long tat would be..

so sad..
she kept me in the dark 4 lyk 5 long days..
n when she broke her silence,her decision was made..
i cant force her 2 love me nw..

already tried twice..
guess we're nt meant 4 each other..

still,i'll nt give up on her..
my heart is always open 4 her in case she has a change of heart..

gdbye Nadila,n mayb i'll see u soon..

2day was racial harmony day..
was ok..

again,didn't get 2 talk 2 Nadila coz she was running away...

took a lot of pics..
n i mean a lot..

i'll post them later...
look forward 2 them

Look. I know we've been friends for a while now.But, I just feel like I can confess to you.It's gonna be hard but.Alright here it goes...

Imagine that the pillow that you cried on was my chest,and the tissue that you wiped your face with was my hand.Girl, imagine: if you needed advise about some other guy, I'm the one that comes to mind.Not tryna hear you tell nobody that I'm just a friend,just trying to make sure I'm that body that you call your man,and anytime you need a shoulder -- it's yours, night or day,but what I'm tryna say is, I wanna be...

The last number you call late at night,The first one that you dial when you open your eyes.Wanna be the one you run to,wanna be the one that ain't gonna hurt you,I wanna be yeah, I wanna be yeah..Be the man making your girl jealous,be the guy shuttin' down all the fellas..whatever you need, girl, it's all on me:soldier, your friend or your lover, girl,I wanna be...

Would it be cool?Would you mind if I called you my boo,what if the next whip you was pushin' was the one I bought for you?Can I be the one that meets your pops and take your mama shoppin', be the only one they like?Have you thought about it -- wait -- really thought about it?Maybe you should take some timecall your girls and talk about it, yeah.'cause I done already made up my mind,don't need no more time to know if I wanna be with you,I wanna be...

Put me on your screen saver, all over your myspace and make me one of your top favorites,that's where I wanna be...The one you cryin' for wanna be your good, bad, love, hate girl..

Cross my heart hoped to die, on everything that's good,I'm gonna do you right, show you right, get this understood.
Girl I wanna be, I wanna be.... I wanna be, I wanna be...

that word..its gone in a split second..haiz

2day was nothing much coz it was friday...
short day..
went 2 prayers as usual..

straight home..
didn't go npcc..
slept..

felt bored so i msged 'Darling'..
4gt her pp8 low..
so msged Farhana..
asked abt 'Darling'

miss her alot so went 2 skool 4 her sake..
didn't realise it was gonna be a mistake..
didn't see much of her..
talked 2 her a little,and tats all..

end of the day,asked her wat tyme she goin home..
said "don't noe..im goin off wit my frens"..then she left me there..

feel really misreable rite nw..
i tot she was waiting 4 me outside skool..
bt when i came out,she was happily walking wit her frens.

i would hav appreciated her 2 say thanks 2 me 4 giving her the present earlier tat morning...
or say happy 1 month anniversary or sumting..
bt it seems as if she didn't care..
so went outside..
thought of our relationship n kept looking at the hp strap tat i have which can be combined wit hers 2 make a rectangular shape...
all alone...
den some frens came n asked if i was alrite..

i said i was ok..
went home wit nothing 2 remember bt my despair n sadness...

nw i wonder if she appreciates me...
only GOD noes..
is tis wat they call one sided love???

i was moaning n groaning at skool 4 lyk 40 mins..
so painful..
even 4 me..
sometimes felt quite ticklish..
hahas

sori long tyme didn't update..
been quite bz lately..

back 2 the moaning n groaning..
dun tink anyting dirty..
its juz tat i went 2 the dentist juz nw..
4 check-up..
everyone in skool has 2 go..
unfortunately my turn came 2day..

i was the 1st 2 be checked among the 5 who were called..
the dentist used tat bloody sharp thing 2 poke2 my teeth..
then wash followed by polish...
the whole process lasted about 40 mins..
it was seriously painful..

when i rinsed my mouth,there was blood galore!!!
ok,mayb nt tat much..bt still hav blood!!!
wth did he do until he has 2 bleed my mouth?!?!?!?!

luckily i gt back 2 class safe n sound..

gt $100 from mummy 2day...
nt 4 free..
there is a reason behind it..
4 me 2 noe n u 2 find out..
hahas...

whole day only with fam..
so boring...
eat,eat n eat some more
afternoon was different though..

my eldest brother's brother-in-law's son passed away...
he's only 3 years old i think..
i think the cause of his death was lung cancer...

so sad...
dieing at such a tender age..
he has a sister n cant give his fullest love 2 her..
her sister is also really unfortunate 2 hav 2 experience such a fate..

his father was crying n his mother was in a really bad shape..
she cried her heart out even during the burial..
i nw realise the significance of family..
find them nw while they r still here n nt wait 4 the last moment 2 find them..
it'll be 2 late..

better be safe than sorry..

so people out there,cherish ur families..
no matter hw bad the situation can be,keep ur love together...
n love each other with equal share

1st NE show juz nw was great...
bt really tires ur legs...
u hav 2 stand there 4 lyk 3 hrs eventhough theres nobody there...
wah..

i didn't get 2 watch much as i was taking care of the concourse area..
i only saw the air show n the fireworks.
hahas
didn't wana miss it..

nothing much 2 say..

juz tat when i was in the train,i realised Syuk n Syah were on the same train bt on the other end..hahas
tats all

CHIP CHIP
normal day..
gt home from friday prayers...
sleep straight away...
then woken up by father..

go sembawang with fam 4 the lamest of reasons..
gt back around 5..
eat at admiralty...
after tat,father went 2 his group of frens..
i went 2 fetch Darling...
mum went home by herself..
bro was nvr in the picture..hahas
he went out,i think 4 soccer training..

waited at bus stop around 6:30pm..
Darling came out at around 6:40..
tats early..4 the ten mins,i spent my time talking 2 Shaz...
then Darling came..
sit n talk 2 her fren..
den she said she wanted 2 go home..
hahas..
so i sent her 2 her block..in front of her house...
kissed me n tis tyme i kissed her back..YAY!!!wth???

so,happy2 go down met Shaz again..
talked 2 Nadhirah at bus stop...


so yeah..quite a gd day..

Nadila oh Nadila..
u always noe hw 2 make me smile...
yes Darling..
i break into tears juz by thinking of u..
im a man..but im still a softy inside..hehehs

2day school as usual...
didn't meet up with Darling coz she went 2 school early 2 finish her malay debate..
although 2day was a long day(finished at 3:15),the thought of Nadila juz made me refreshed...
HAHAHA!!!seriously!!!

sad also coz i tot cannot send her home 2day coz im going Bishan 2 take Bay Ambassador uniform...
then found ot counsellors take 4 us already..
so told heri could meet up wit her..
then again,found out only uniforms available...
security passes must take ourselves..
WTH?!?!?!

so told her cannot send her home..
after school met up with Hakeem n go 2 Bishan..
walk around n cannot find the building..
called Hazmie n finally found the building..
we've been walking around it all tis while..stupid..=.=

so took the lift n went up 2 5th floor..
gt there took our passes n everything..
straight home..
wore the stupid pass while in the train..step fanatic..hahas
took it off eventually..

go back school
den wait Darling finish netball...
lucky i was early..n i mean early..hahas
outside school,talk 2 her n her fren,Lydia..
play Lydia's psp...
den my fren noisy ask me faster send Nadila home..
so i asked him wait downstairs n i send Nadila home..

tk tau malu n i asked her 2 kiss me..
of course on the cheek..
its 2 early 2 go further than tat..
bt i will nt go tat far as 2 bringing her up staircases...DUH!!!

she kissed me n i was on cloud nine..hehe..
i was so excited tat i said gdbye n went straight down the lift..hahas
sori i didn't give back a kiss 2 u..i was 2 overwhelmed by urs..

I really love u..
n i noe u love me..


She's always on my mind...
from the time i wake up..
till i close my eyes..
She's everywhere i go..
She's all i know..

yep2...
love u many2

Monday,30 June 2008

so happy..
came back from Syuk's house at 6..
watched Euro 2008 finals as u noe..hahas

then sat on couch with towel over my shoulder a while..
looked at Darling's face on my phone..
i made it my wallpaper..
hahas
miss her a lot..
went 2 take a bath..
then do wat is neccessary 4 school...

walked 2 school..
didn't go 2 the back gate...
walked 2 Darling's void-deck..
wait 4 her..
very long..haha
bt still wait..
i wanted 2 go bt my heart said wait a while longer..i tot she already went..

my patience paid off.
she finally came down at abt 7.15..
so late..
her house near 2 school mah..haha
then talked abt Euro n other soccer stuff..(tats sumting we have in common..SOCCER!!!)
then i told her abt tat brilliant free-kick i scored on saturday..
then say bye2..

after school 4gt 2 meet her at cntral staircase..
bt still met her..
she said hav fitness training planned by netballers..
i had z club..PERFECT!!!so i tot..
go home,take soccer kit n come back school..
come back already she said run liao..WTH??so fast?!?!?!
only 6 ppl present at z club..
Hakeem came late n made it 7..

i was tired playing soccer so i sat at Ncc shooting room door,hugged my bag n sleep..
tis female devil,Heed came 2 me n spray water with wter bottle..
bt gave her chance coz im a gentleman...
then Darling came..
said"bangun..."
n i said"penat uh"
then i put my head on her shoulder n sleep..HAHAHA!!!!so rude...bt comfortable..hehe
then she asked me wanna go home nt...
i said ok coz she's my top priority after my frens...
gave Arwis his bag n said bye2..

sent Darling home with her fren s being so noisy n all...=.=
talk some nonsense with her..
then reach coffee shop she realised she 4gt her school uniform....my girl is so 4getful..hahas
mayb she cannot wait 2 meet me so very excited n 4gt abt it...
went back 2 school...took uniform n go..
talk nonsense again...some was abt Mifzal..hahas..

sent her home up 2 her house bt at the lift was as far as i could go..
salam n bye2...hehes..

Labels: Love is not about finding someone you can live with...its finding someone you can't live without

Yay!!!

Spain won!!!!as expected..hahas..
Torres scored the Champion determining goal..
i knew he would score coz i see tat illa was out injured
i prefer him than Villa coz he has better looks tat could threaten mine...
another is coz he has 2 me the better ability 2 score than Villa..
he's nt scoring coz Villa is nt passing!!!
n also becoz Villa is made the some sort of target man..
or mayb he juz has better luck than Torres..

I would lyk 2 congratulate Spain on their i think 1st European Champinship win

although Germany was god,they were nt good enough..
only Schweinsteiger is good in their team..
Ballack padan muke kene headbutt..HAHAHAHAHA!!!
bloody right eye..

Ramos missed a great chance 2 put Spain 2 gials up..
Torres missed his 1st effort on target with his header hitting the post..
Iniesta also hit the woodwork with his thundering shot..
wait,i think it hit a defender..
FCUKing defender!!!!